I have experienced peacefulness in degrees. Often it is as a result of accepting something I previously was resisting or fighting against. In parenting, I, often, am trying to control a situation and then my sons resist my controlling behaviour and we butt heads and argue. When I let those tendencies go, a different atmosphere enters my home. I am instead having a little niggling feeling of angst within me but it subsides when I experience the results. But this is about the practice of peacefulness which brings about the experience. I am unable to experience it unless I practice it. So in the example I relayed above, I practice peacefulness in giving up the love of control. Realising that the battle between the boys and me is one I mostly loose and the only one that suffers in the end is me. Relinquishing control is caring and loving from a different vantage point. It is giving the boys the leash to make their mistakes despite my crystal ball capabilities, and learn lessons the hard way. Thing is they cannot see the results of their actions and neither could I at their age. My parents sat exactly where I am sitting now. I recall my cocky nature, hardened arrogance and salty tongue. The lessons I learned as a result of spontaneous and foolhardy foraging into adulthood were hard but necessary, because I was given the option of listening and obeying in the first place but I viewed that as restriction and control and not coming from a place of love. Hindsight is always 20/20 but you cannot go back and have a do-over, you can only see things very clearly. It is a new experience for me to choose justice over anger.
Comments