I have been grappling with the notion that leaders in the coaching field, those who instruct coaches how to coach and improve their practice, emphatically encourage their tribes to avoid any religious or spiritual language as they explain what it is they do as they strive to reach out to prospective clients. This confused me at first, as I believe that the very essence of what it is we are doing is spiritual, it is heart opening work and, I believe, this heart opening can only be obtained and maintained through nourishment from the Creative Word. Actually this is what my instructor admitted but he said that even though the work is predominantly spiritual we do not say it is. We lure them in with science and rhetoric that appeals to a wider audience. I am seeing how many people feel threatened by spiritual language because of their own experiences that have left painful wounds or they are simply ignorant to the potency of spiritual forces. Whatever the reason may be, as a coach I must meet any prospective client exactly where they are in their life and the reality is that many people have been walking through life bereft of the knowledge of the presence of a power greater than themselves. I was initially hurt and put off by the instructor's perspective in this course I am pursuing, one he assured me in his lessons would appeal to CEOs of large companies. It is true it is not their language but that is not the audience I seek to work with. But it is not only this audience that thinks and behaves in this way and this is the reality I have had to face. I gave a free session to a friend who told me point blank that she was uncomfortable with my coaching approach because she did not believe in God. I accepted that she did not believe in God but was thrown that I was making her uncomfortable. How to resolve this? I am a spiritual person who is a member of the Baha'i Faith, what some may call an organised religion. This is my reality and I will not apologise for it. People often tell me that they are drawn to me as I am so peaceful and wise. This is because I am a Baha'i and I would not be this way if I were not. This I must be candid and frank about. I know that speaking about spiritual things puts some people off but that is their stuff and not mine. It is clearly a sign that we will not be a good fit and if someone wants to refine their inner condition then they need to work with someone who makes them comfortable enough to dig deep into the dirty pain that resides in their hearts. I am who I am and cannot pretend or distill this fact. Actually, when I am open and honest about my beliefs then it will enable a client to make an informed choice and after all it is about them, not about me. These are the thoughts that certitude stirs within me today as I resist allowing the world to define my values. I will continue my course, to develop my practice in the open and honest way I know how.
This is exactly why I finally dropped out of finishing my Masters thesis. The research I was doing showed that women theorists were using spiritual language but I was told that was not allowed. It meant I could not be true to my research.