The impulse to go with my first reaction to any given situation is so very strong. Before I realise it the words are out of my mouth, my face contorts into an expression that reveals thoughts that I do not want to share publicly or I have taken a deep dive into consuming quantities of foods that I know do not sustain my health. How do I cultivate the self-discipline to let go of the insidious practices of backbiting and fault-finding? The Baha'i Writings tells me that the purpose of this life is to develop and strengthen these virtues for life beyond. This process feels like hard work and is painful yet it is the path on which I must persevere, it is God's will. There are no awards, no praise just the quiet effort that I need to put in at every moment. I make many mistakes as I forage about seeking to grow virtues into something beautiful and visible. There is no point where I may say, "I have arrived... I have got it and mastered its practices." I am an elf constantly at work on building my own character, a project that will last my entire lifetime. It is a project that calls for vigilance, constant sustained effort and exertion. So how do I know I am progressing? I ought to remember to bring myself to account each day... asking the question, was I better today today than I was yesterday? Was I able to subdue the appetites of my ego? Whatever the answer, the work demands more attention, more focus and perseverance the next day. I have a tendency to be slack in my exertion when I am tired or feeling sad, this is when I need self-discipline most of all! I do not believe that I am a good gardener. I love to do it but it takes effort and at times I do not feel motivated or inclined to do what a garden needs each day. I started a garden with the help of a friend this past spring. At first, I was very attentive, but as I look outside now, I see a wilderness of vegetable plants and weeds. To carefully cultivate my character means to learn to be a better gardener.
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